Just a reminder

This is a list of reminders to myself. They could be relevant to you, if they are, I hope they can help motivate greater kindness towards yourself. I was inspired by similar posts that Liz has made.

  • It’s okay to be sad and cry. You don’t have to try to act strong all the time. You’re just ignoring emotions that are going to build up and explode (boom).
  • You should not feel stupid because you are unable to do something that someone else can (and don’t use that ‘everyone can’ excuse, because that is a lie).
  • Measuring your own self worth on any kind of scale (including ones where other people are involved) is a lie.
  • So you don’t look like a model or won’t be a cover girl. It does not mean that you are ugly and worthless. That kind of theory gives you an F-.
  • Thigh gap. Just GTFO.
  • Maybe medication helps you to function like a somewhat normal noodle. Better than the alternative.
  • There is no normal noodle. Duh.
  • Having a partner, being in a relationship, making babies does not make you a complete person. Do things your own way (and if partner and babies is what you want, then that is your way).
  • It does not hurt to be kind to other people. However, if they treat you poorly for no good reason, you have a right to voice your opinions (heh).
  • Just because you might think/act/interact/communicate with people differently, doesn’t mean that you’re a failure.
  • Mental illness and 8 cats doesn’t make you a…… well, maybe a little.
  • Every so called flaw that you worry about, is actually a small part of what makes you the unique person you are.
  • You can’t control what has already been, but you can learn to manage and live with the parts that really hurt.
  • Guess what, a lot of ‘talent skills’ actually require learning techniques (gasp). So, you say you can’t draw, bullpoop. I know you can, just dedicate some time to perfecting and exploring.
  • You can say you haven’t written creatively for a long time because your concentration is poor or whatever other reason you have. You’re not going to improve your skills and let loose in the creative writing bubble if you write nothing. Just write whatever. You don’t have to share it with anyone, just freaking do it.
  • There is no right way or wrong way (well, technically, if you are living a life of crime, that isn’t good).
  • It’s okay to laugh at yourself, when you are trying to be funny, or just get a kick out of your own sense of humour sometimes.
  • Random blog posts can be a thing, if you want them to be.

Questions
1. What reminder would you give to yourself?

About the author / Kya

I am Kya a twenty something who loves art, cute things, design, illustration, photography, reading, writing and creative adventures.

Website

36 Comments

  • This is a great list. Really really great. <33 You are great <333

    • Kya

      NO YOU ARE!

  • Aw, these are really great reminders. Just generally really motivating. I need to remind myself that my blog doesn’t have to be perfect (sort of like your random blog post one) because in the end it’s my blog and it’s for me and what I do doesn’t exist to amuse others. I also need to remind myself not to compare my artwork with that of others. I may think that someone else’s artwork is amazing, but I need to stop bringing my own down because of it and just create.

    • Kya

      They are really great reminders, and I need to remember them as well!

  • “It’s okay to be sad and cry. ”

    So so so so so true! In fact, I agree with the whole list.

  • This list is a great reminder for motivation! I agree with a lot (if not, all of this). You definitely don’t need to be in a relationship or having kids to be a complete person. Doing what YOU want to do makes you that way whether it includes them or not. And yesss, there’s no need for thigh gap, it’s optional but not having it doesn’t make you less of a person.

    Skills or talents can be acquired by believing in yourself and pushing yourself to learn.

    A reminder I give to myself is to remember my struggles that I went to in order to be where I am today. In addition, just to know that I will get to a point where I want to be one day as long as I work hard for it. :)

  • I love all of these, and you!

    Gosh, I could write a really long list of these. Guess I’ll add that to the list of topics to blog about… when I actually get around to publishing it… I need to stop being a perfectionist. :P

    • Kya

      Doooo it. Blogblogblogblogblog

  • Ana

    1) I’m not a failure just because I was fired and cannot find a job.
    2) Liking anime and cartoons a bit at my age does not make me stupid and childish.
    3) I must try to curb my possessiveness and be selfish and too jealous of my things.

    Can’t think of more right now, these were at forefront of my mind. .__.

    Thanks for your comment, and sorry for my extremely late reply; I don’t check Citylights very often these days. :p
    The only problem with what you say is that I’m the only one in my family who thinks the iPad is mine; my parents think everything belongs to my niece when she’s with us, and that I hog the tablet the rest of the time….but they can’t even use it. 0_0

    • Kya

      They are some really great reminders as well! :D

  • These are great reminders, Kya. Some of them are things I need to remember, too! I know I’d remind myself to be more patient and be more flexible and be less stubborn. I also need to remember to ask for help when I need it IRL, especially with challenging children in my workplace . . .

    • Kya

      Good point! It can be hard to ask for help, I hope that it can be something that you can learn to do, and not feel bad about it.

  • Thigh gap. :( :( :( :( :( :( Hate that one. I grumbled and groaned and got angry at the entire concept and the fact that it gave young girls an illusion of what is “beautiful”, until someone pointed out that I actually do have one. :| :| :|

    These are really nice and bittersweet reminders for yourself, I know I tell myself similar things sometimes. Sometimes we need to be a bit harsh and tell ourselves that we are better than we think we are, or that we sometimes just need to get real.

    It is definitely okay to cry. It’s okay to have feelings. :) And sometimes we do need to laugh at ourselves sometimes, to make ourselves feel better.

    There is definitely no right or wrong way to live life!

    I think the main things I tell myself all the time are “you are stronger than this”, “I promise it’s going to be okay” and “you are not superwoman”. Another one of my favourites is “do whatever you want”. :D

  • These were really great! I’m learning to remind myself that I don’t need to blog traditionally to pop by my friend’s blogs, and see how they’re doing. :P I have to remind myself that’s it’s okay to do my own thing. And yea, there is no normal noodle! Medication can help just not feeling like a loose canon (at least for me) and help you get to your own “normal” of just not feeling like total poop. S: *huggles*

  • All of this because it’s so relevant to my life, but if I had to pick one, it would have to be: I am deserving of love and of a life. My problems are relevant and important. Thank you for posting this. Sometimes I just forget about these things.

    • Kya

      I am glad you liked this. It can be easy to let the important things slip by sometimes. That’s why you do have to remind yourself. :)

  • Nice list! very inspiring. My favourite one is “So you don’t look like a model or won’t be a cover girl. It does not mean that you are ugly and worthless. That kind of theory gives you an F-.” and I think every girl should keep that in mind.

  • Joy

    Bah! I love this post for several reasons. First one being that I felt like I was writing this list and these are probably things I should be saying to myself often and until I read this, I had no idea how hard I am on myself. Thank you so much for this.

    Second reason is that this showed me so much about who you are as a person and I think it’s amazing when people get to understand other people and that’s always hard. Especially, over the internet. You’re an amazing soul! This post was a breath of fresh air =)

    • Kya

      *hug x ten billion*

  • Cat

    I love this list :) The first few are great for remembering when it comes to self esteem. It’s definitely ok to cry and comparing yourself to others doesn’t mean you’re stupid or worthless.

    A definite “yes” to the talent skills one! Some people give up before they try something because they feel like they can’t do it. People become good at skills or hobby because they work on it. No one is amazing right away.

    I think a reminder I’d add is, “pick your battles wisely”. There are some things worth getting worked up over, and others that don’t matter in the long run. It’s not worth getting mad over every little thing.

    • Kya

      That is a very good reminder!

  • I love this list! Definitely something I resonate with. Something I’d have to remind myself a lot of is that I am loved, I do have friends I can count on, and there are good people in the world.

    • Kya

      <3

  • Aw, I love this list. Everyone needs to remember at least one thing on this list and they’ll be a little happier for it! I often have to remind myself that I’m not defined by my grades or what others think I can or can’t do. I do what I can and if that’s not enough for some people, then that’s not my fault. :) Things like these slip my mind often and the way people carry themselves can sometimes make you forget the little things you should really focus on.

    I sure wish there was a reminder for reminders! x_x

    • Kya

      Reminders of reminders should be a thing.

      Ding. Remember your reminders!

  • Having a partner, being in a relationship, making babies does not make you a complete person. Do things your own way (and if partner and babies is what you want, then that is your way).

    I like this. As someone who’s been in a relationship for over 3 years, it’s even more relevant, because after so long you can kind of lose yourself in your relationship. But no! You shouldn’t! Your long-term BF isn’t everything, Jess!

  • This list definitely consist of many great reminders! :) <3

    • Kya

      :D

  • Wow. :B I LOVE this post and I agree with what you listed down. <3

    And I want to give you a big internet hug because many of what you listed are things I have to keep in mind. I've been a little down lately, you see. :(
    (I could quote all the points that are very relevant to me right now, but I'm afraid this will be a long post lol)

    Something I have to constantly remind myself is that it's OKAY to be childlike. It's OKAY to unleash that inner child even if people find you weird because of it. Be your own kind of normal.

    Also, another thing is that it's okay to move at your own pace, provided you get to where you want to be. I have to learn how to stop comparing myself with the achievements of others. There is enough success in this world for everyone.

    • Kya

      BIG INTERNET HUG FOREVER. :D

  • Hm…I think you pretty much covered everything. I need to print out this post, so I can read it every day. |)

  • I totally agree, a good list with the best reminders. This will be a note to myself too. Or as my grandmother (mother’s mother) said: “There is no I must!”. Have a great weekend!

  • Sara

    After I turned 28, I told myself that I was only going to do things which made me happy and that life was too short to get silly over little things which depressed you. This is why I wasn’t as sad as I used to be, because really, it wasn’t worth it. Just keep at it and you will get there. :)

    …that sort of thing!

  • Thank you for making this list, I can actually relate to a lot of the things you just said! I am so happy that someone thinks the way I do and it kinda served as a reminder list for me as well.

    “Just because you might think/act/interact/communicate with people differently, doesn’t mean that you’re a failure.”
    – This is my favorite because I’ve always been an oddball since childhood. People all around me are putting pressure on me to do some things I don’t feel the need for yet, and sometimes I can’t help but compare myself to others. This is a great reminder that I just have a different measure of success and that I don’t have to compare my achievements to that of everyone else’s.

  • These are really great reminders! A lot spoke to me. I have to say my reminder to myself is that I deserve to be loved as much as the next person.

  • Great list. Would you mind if I write a similar one on my blog? :)

    The first thing I would write is: If you are getting way too comfortable, maybe you need to be shaken a bit. Go out, try something new, take chances.

    P.S.
    I love your blog design :)

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