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See ya 2013

Another year is almost over and 2014 is knocking on our doors! Hopefully it can be a year where we all welcome the visitor, who will bring many positive gifts.

For me, 2013 was a kind of a difficult year. Not as traumatic as 2012 was, but it was still hard. I faced a lot of challenges with mental health, lost a friend to suicide, lost my dear grandparents dog and lived in a numb daze a lot of the time. However, I was lucky in that I had my parents there for me and two good noodles friends named Nicole and Claire who put up with my craziness and for some strange reason still wanted to be friends. Siriusly Seriously though, they really helped me in so many ways and inspired to give me hope.

What do I want for 2014? I mainly hope that I can settle and try to find stability. I don’t want to make major plans for the future until I am at a place where I am thinking clearly and can handle all that goes with major decisions (take 2012, where I thought my only option was to start a business). I hope that I will reach out for help and keep striving to get to a good place while also still working on creative projects and sharing love with the people I care about.

Now for some kind of random things. :B

Continue reading…

Kya

Living in a Sandbox

The last few days/week I have been feeling really blah. Very tired, sleepy, sick. Basically depressed. I have been thinking and dreaming about my Nanna a lot (who passed away in May 2010). I miss her so much. :( The fact I can never hug her again, and that the generations after me will never know her is such a huge shame. *sigh* I know they can know her through stories passed on, it’s just not the same as knowing someone.

I took Kitdung and Mogwai to the vet to be de-sexed. Everything went well, except for the fact that Mogwai is actually a boy not a girl ahahah. Fail. I really really thought he was a she. I’ve raised heaps of kittens over the years, but he was a sneaky little boy.

I have been slack with emails and just about everything online. It has been taking me a lot of energy to do anything which really sucks. The stupid internet connection I am using is driving me crazy. It sails a long at 11kbps (arrrrh) and likes to disconnect all the time. Grr.

I was going to get a Mac, it was kind of a spur of the moment thing because I have been wanting one for years (they are sexy). Mum and Dad talked me out of it (at least for now, har har). After thinking about it for a while, I think what I was really wanting was happiness not just a Mac. Because the idea of one opens the doors for happiness and delight. If I can find ways to bring some positives in, I might want a Mac less (or more? Bwahaha).

Hah, I brought more DVDs.

  1. Invictus
  2. Is Anybody There
  3. Gamer
  4. Two Hands
  5. The Haunting In Connecticut
  6. Seventh Moon
  7. The Final Destination
  8. Elizabeth
  9. Elizabeth The Golden Age
  10. The Thaw
  11. Blood Creek
  12. The Princess and the Frog
  13. Old Dogs
  14. The Box

I have been on a bit of a horror movie marathon lately. Sometimes watching them alone is a bad idea. :P Are you on iCheckmovies.com? :D If you are add me, Kya.

Kya

Silence this screaming emotion

Dad is home again, he isn’t too well but it will take time. The biggest shock to me was that he needs to have chemo. It shocked Mum as well. They said they believe all the cancer IS gone, but they have to do this to kill any cells that might be wondering around. I know it probably has to happen, I just know it will be a hard road for him. But I will be here to support him, and show my love. I’m pretty much emotionally fucked today. If I wasn’t on anti-depresants it would be an ‘end of the world day’.

I am passing my time today adding more movies to my library. We had brought a stack but I had been too lazy to add them. So I will probably update the online version some time today, or tomorrow.

Poll is still open, vote away if you haven’t already.

[poll id="2"]

Kya